In addition to many situations that have developed in these times, when the influence of social media has increased, comparing ourselves to others has also increased. Due to social media posts, we have compared ourselves to others, perhaps more than we have ever done before. As someone acquires new hobbies and skills, “Why can't I do it?” There were even moments when we felt inadequate.

Oubaitori is a Japanese saying. The situation to which this word corresponds can be summarized as follows: There are four different trees that bloom in the spring. Cherry, plum, apricot and peach… All these trees wait for their own time to bloom and they are all special. Just like people…

Oubaitori is a concept that aims to remind people that, like these four fruit-bearing trees, people have different life journeys from each other. According to this motivating belief, instead of comparing yourself to others, you should be aware of the qualities that make you similar and focus only on your own journey. Oubaitori removes the pressure of “I have to change, I have to improve, I have to be like them”. You know you have a time, and somehow you will shine one day. As long as you compare with others, you take your focus away from yourself, and in fact you are the one sabotaging your own journey.

The truth is, everyone goes through their own special moments in their own lifeline. In order to obtain those details that you describe as perfect, there is no way for you to know exactly how the people you admire went through the exams and tough conditions. After all, people don't get to see all of your efforts either, do they? For this reason, it will be the right step of your journey to realize that there is a labor and process behind the successes that people seem to have achieved very easily, and to patiently do what is necessary for your goal. The success of others should be a motivator for you, not a comparison. You shouldn't try to think, "So it's not impossible."

Another thing you need to do in this process is not to make self-deprecating speeches. Whatever happens, don't try to make yourself look unsuccessful in order not to appear egotistical. Remember: If you don't believe in yourself, others will have a hard time believing you.

 

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